Goggle is your friend

There is no need to keep yourself equipped with knowledge about the world, no need to read up to enlarge your information bank, no need to keep yourself abreast of the current affairs, because today, when someone asks you a question, you could simply reply, “Go google it.”

So I ran today

It’s been a long while since I have run. Besides keeping fit and in good shape, running helps me to think clearer, to relax. I quite enjoy running, though most of the times, I have to drag myself to run, due to the flab on my belly becoming more outstanding, only to find out that, while running, that it can be stimulating. After runs, I would feel refreshed and energised, ready to conquer any obstacles ahead! Well, they are usually merely assignments.

So I ran today. Right after lessons, I went back to hall quickly, got changed and began my run. It was actually my inaugural run in the NTU Sports and Recreational Centre (SRC). Though I’ve been to this place before as I have had floorball games here, I didn’t quite have a good look at the place. NTU SRC was indeed a sports hub. It encompassed many sport facilities; basketball courts, swimming pools, squash courts, you name it – a paradise to sports fanatics like me. I could visit this place every day and try out different sport each time. I must comment that NTU SRC is quite a lively place, especially at the basketball courts where I noticed guys and girls playing together. In NUS, this would be quite a rare sight. One can hardly spot girls playing sports unless they are obliged to due to training for the Inter-Varsity Games or Inter-Hall Games. If not, one won’t be able to see girls playing sports. Jogging, swimming and exercising in gyms don’t count, because those girls just want to be in good shapes.

So I ran today. I decided to run non-stop for 30 minutes. I had not run for close to 2 weeks and I considered that I might not be physically conditioned enough to run any longer. If not, I would have tried for 45 minutes. Well, I guess I shall leave that for another day. May that day come soon, I hope.

So I ran today. 15 rounds round the NTU track within 32 minutes. That’s 6 km! Well, it’s pretty normal actually. It’s not even 20 percent of a normal marathon distance. It’s not that I am training to run one. It's just that the distance 6 km is not even considered a feat to seasoned runners. 6 km, to me, is an accomplishment already. After the run, I did some static exercises and explored the compound again before strolling back to hall.

So I ran today, and I felt so satisfied. I am looking forward to my next run. It shall happen next week.

World Peace

I came home late last night. I was quite bored, so I turned on the TV to see if there’s anything interesting or at least something that is able to hold my attention for a little longer.

Ok there was Miss World 2008 on Channel 5… *switch* some Jackie Chan movie on Channel 8… *switch* some Jacky Wu’s variety show on Channel U… WHAT?!?! Miss World?

My first priority is always to know the events happening around the WORLD. Who cares if Jackie Chan can fight off 10 men at one time or Jacky Wu’s lame jokes, the WORLD comes first. I need to know the issues about our WORLD, so I switched back to Channel 5.

But to my sheer disappointment, it’s actually a show where beautiful, gorgeous women parade in tiny bikinis and designers’ night gowns, where they smile constantly no matter where they are or what they’re doing.

One thing I don’t understand is that they smile a lot, ( so much that you could sense their cheek muscles cramping anything soon) but when it is announced that they’re the winner, for that split moment, they cry.

Sometimes they try to cover their mouths or faces to hide their initiate expressions, as if they cannot accept the result. The runners-up, on the other hand, display wide, enchanting smiles. “Phew, I am just here for the fun and experience. 2nd place is good enough. I don’t have to waste one year doing charity work.”

Of course I wasn’t exactly disappointed looking at beautiful girls. But what’s with Miss World competition? Didn’t we just have had the Miss Universe competition held in Vietnam not long ago? And why must there be 2 very similar or should I say identical competitions? In fact, both have the swimsuit and evening gown contests, the Q&A for the final 5 finalists and many other similarities. They are exactly the same but just competitions with different names.

Can you imagine a few months after World Cup 2006 ended, there is the Universe Cup 2006? It is where the same countries compete against one another again, playing the same game of soccer, with same rules and with same system all over again?

There’s even another competition called Miss Earth, a third-grade pageant competition, where the contestants are mainly Miss World/Universe rejects or maybe they just have strong passions to make to Earth a better place to live in.

Are there anymore such contests?

How about a Miss Globe contest? Or Miss Solar System? Or is there a Miss Milky Way competition currently being held on the Jupiter planet right now? And who gets to represent Earth if there is really one such competition? Is it Miss World or Miss Universe or Miss Earth?

As the name suggests, Miss Earth gets my vote. In addition, Miss World and Miss Universe should be banned. Where are the representatives from Mars and Saturn? Aren’t they part of the world and universe too? It’s no wonder there are always stories of aliens attacking Earth. I can imagine some Martians observing us from afar, cursing, “How dare those Earthlings not include us as part of the universe?! What disrespect! We are going to show them who real the boss is. Let’s attack them!”

I continued watching nevertheless.

In case some of you don’t know, this year’s Miss World is held in Johannesburg, South Africa. When the top 15 finalists were announced, Miss South Africa was one of them. Then it reminded me that not long ago during the Miss Universe 2008 held in Vietnam, Miss Vietnam was one of the top 15 finalists too. And for the many past Miss Universe competitions, the representative from the host country will always reach the top 15.

Then I wondered: Is there such a thing as home advantage in pageant competitions? Well, home advantage usually has a huge influence in sports where the home team, being cheered on by the home crowd, is more likely to perform better than the away team. It’s like during the recent Olympics in Beijing, China, for the first time, managed to win the most number of gold medals.

As for Miss World/Universe, do the pageant contestants really tend to look better in their homeland? So much so that they are able to garner a place in the semi finals? I don’t see how the home crowd can affect their performances or appearances. The panel of judges comes from different countries. Obviously they are expected to be unbiased towards any of the contestants. “Wow, the crowd seems to cheer the loudest when Miss South Africa comes on stage, I think I will go with the crowd and give her the highest marks.”

Then the 5 finalists were announced. Miss India, Miss Trinidad & Tobago, Miss Angola, Miss Russia and, to the delight of the home crowd, Miss South Africa. It’s Q&A time. Everyone except Miss Russia answered in English. Apparently, Miss Russia who is not well versed in English, brought translator with her. What a smart move that was.

When asked why she should be crowned Miss World 2008, Miss Russia answered confidently, “Я думаю, что я могу помочь людям, и я хочу помочь людям и сегодня если я уйду с этой короной, то я сделаю это.”

For those who are unfamiliar with the Russian language, Miss Russia could be saying, “I am so fed up with this competition lah. I miss home. I miss my Papa, my Mama and my little puppy. I miss the Russian food. Oh mama mia, I can’t wait for all of this to end leh. I wanna go home!” After that, she charmed the audience with her megawatt smile, while her translator who spoke fluently in English said, "I want to help people and today if I walk away with this crown I will do that."

Today, translators play an important part in beauty contests. If you have a bimbo representative for your country, make sure she declares she cannot speak English well and get a quick witted translator for her. “Ok so now it is Miss United Kingdoms’ turn for Q&A and she has brought with her a translator. Now your question is …..”

Soon after, it was announced that Miss Russia won the Miss World 2008 title and that gives her the license to help people. It’s like you even need a pretty face to help the needy or do charity work. “Opps sorry, Kate, you are not good-looking enough to help the orphans, build toilets for disaster-torn places or educate the world about AIDS. We not only need to do good, but to look good as well.”

-doubleU

Examania

IT’s really time I should update this blog.

I’ve just ended my exams. Actually it’s already been a week since then. There’s some things I’ve noticed people do during the exams which I don’t quite understand. Like for example, before we start the papers, the chief examiner would always remind us, “Please ensure that you do not have any exam-related documents on your table.” I mean is there really a need to inform us about that? We all know it’s a closed-book examination. Is it an effective method to deter anyone from cheating? “Ok. You got me. I am going to keep my notes away from the table now.”

Besides that, for all of the papers I’ve done, I have always struggle to finish them and I can’t help but to notice there’s some students who can leave the examination hall early. Ok they probably have finished their papers fast but are they really that confident they can find no mistakes at all? What is more important than passing up a good paper during this exam period? “Alright, I have to go now. I am actually late for a lunch appointment.”

Of course, I am delighted to see them leave early. “Go by all means. Don’t waste your time checking the papers. Enjoy yourself outside.”

Another thing is, without fail, there’s always people who need to go to the toilet. It’s something that has never occurred to me. I would want to maximize my time answering the questions to perfection and there are people who think they have all the time in the world to do so. Hello, when the clock starts ticking, we should unload the information from our brains and not the urea in your bladder.

What have they been drinking while doing the questions? 1.5 litres of coke? Everyone brings in their 500ml of water bottles and these people bring what? tumblers of water and go gulp, gulp, gulp? Or what kind of bladders do they have? Those with the size of a peanut? I don’t get it.

While I was in a deep thought of how to tackle the paper, I hate it when the examiner would go to the microphone and say things like, “Sorry for the interuptions but can you all please turn to question 39 on page 16? Take note that the unit “KG” should be in small letters, not capital letters.”

Of course we know all it should be in small letters!! Is there any difference anyway?!

Thanks for wasting 2 minutes of my time. And the worse part is the examiners do not compensate us for these interruptions. Firstly, the printing error is their mistake and then wasting our time disturbing our focused mental states in the exams and all at our expense!!

And when the time’s up, the chief examiner would order, “Pens down!” which all of us would oblige. I’ve noticed some students would put their pens down, then start flipping through their papers and checking through them. Isn’t it like the worst time to check your papers?

So what if you have found an error, is there anything you can do about it? Nothing. I say, just drop your pens, close your booklets and leave it to the examiners to collect them. You’ve done your best already, my friends.

There’s another incident when this ang-moh student left his whole OTA sheet blank and claimed to have written the MCQ answers in the booklet. Then I would pose him a question. “Do you think the OTA sheet is there for you to wipe your backside?”


-doubleU

Mouses?

I don’t know if this sounds right, so maybe you can tell me.

There’s one time the mouse of my laptop is spoilt and I have to buy a new one. Then my sister said hers is becoming faulty too and asked if I could buy for her. Naturally, I have to agree.

I walked into a computer shop, found an assistant and asked her “You know where can I find some……………….. mice?”

Turtle

On Monday, 4th September, a worldwide respected conservationist, Steve Irwin, died. He was stabbed through the heart by a stingray while filming.

Hours later, MSN users are advised to put a turtle icon in their nicknames as a form of paying respect to the deceased celebrity.

But a turtle??!

Is that the closest icon that can resemble him? Are you saying he is slow or blur-looking like that reptile? How about the snail icon? That's surely slower than the turtle.

For those who don't know him, Steve Irwin was a brave man. He dared to venture to places many don't. Maybe there should have a more closely related icon?

Why not use rose icon? At least, I know people give roses at funerals.

And why must we put icons on MSN this time to commemorate someone's death? Does it make any difference? Is this some trend coming along?

What if Angelina Jolie pass away? I think we should put the LIPS icon. Or Alex Ferguson, we can upload the DEVIL'S face. MSN has just found a new purpose for itself.

And some might ask, what is a Croc Hunter doing with a stingray? Mind you, he specialised in crocodiles but he knows alot about wildlife animals as well. It is purely an accident that this had happened. Another TV luminary gone from the face of the earth.

Of course, in MSN, there are some people who felt emotional about his death and left some messages of condolesence.

Here's some of them:

" to the wildlife warrior, we can make a difference"

" Crikey! I'm Gonna Miss Steve Irwin... He's left so much behind... Blessings~ "

" Let's chiong sting rays in Newton Circle to avenge the crocodile hunter!"

" Turtle Bat Cow Goat Dog Cat"


-doubleU

Great vision....

During orientation, my OG is slacking while waiting for instructions for the next activity.

Then my OGL came.

" Hey people, I pass this form around. You just fill in your particulars, MSN, HP number etc."

And the form was circulated.

Soon it came to me. I used my left hand, picked up the pen and began writing.

Seeing that, my friend exclaimed " Wei De, you are a left-handed ah?"

A sigh followed. A look of helplessness flashed across my face. I am speechless.

" No, I am actually a right handed. I am only trying to write with my left hand and hey I can write it alot better!"

This is not the first time it happened to me. Of course being a leftie has it's perks and attention. But when it is obvious, you don't have to ask again.

Now I understand why this friend of mine ( let's call him Ben) hates to go out with his brother.

Ben does not like to stand beside his brother, let alone walking along Orchard Rd. No, not because both of them have a strong sibling rivalry. When they go out together, they invite stares from passengers. Fingers pointing and whispering surround them. It's as if they are circus animals parading in town. They are only normal human beings yet people find it amazing to see the 2 of them. Inevitably, this question will be raised.

" Hello, are you 2 twins?"

-doubleU